It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery