no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend