Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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