Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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