Texts From Last Night

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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??

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  (551): do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse?? http://tfl.nu/m371
  Replies (22) Good night (3539) Bad night (592) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.

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  (310): you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk. http://tfl.nu/ad2i
  Replies (21) Good night (4795) Bad night (1080) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.

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  (617): i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night. http://tfl.nu/15vj
  Replies (50) Good night (4903) Bad night (1541) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  She's like a pop up book from hell.

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  (716): She's like a pop up book from hell. http://tfl.nu/grf5
  Replies (18) Good night (913) Bad night (3956) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.

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  (404): She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more. http://tfl.nu/sgvu
  Replies (12) Good night (4696) Bad night (1258) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met

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  (716): She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met http://tfl.nu/xjfv
  Replies (10) Good night (708) Bad night (4560) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer

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  (905): He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer http://tfl.nu/xvzr
  Replies (9) Good night (4658) Bad night (1131) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate

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  (206): This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate http://tfl.nu/vfhs
  Replies (6) Good night (2238) Bad night (1491)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one

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  (513): you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one http://tfl.nu/cjl0
  Replies (9) Good night (2195) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.

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  (802): Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester. http://tfl.nu/l7en
  Replies (1) Good night (1446) Bad night (547) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.

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  (941): oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed. http://tfl.nu/cdno
  Replies (5) Good night (1209) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.

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  (774): Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider. http://tfl.nu/cq9b
  Replies (1) Good night (1059) Bad night (307) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.

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  (919): I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career. http://tfl.nu/kw3u
  Replies (14) Good night (1807) Bad night (369) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.

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  (913): The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops. http://tfl.nu/e530
  Replies (13) Good night (1462) Bad night (607)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.

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  (248): Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed. http://tfl.nu/r0u0
  Replies (1) Good night (681) Bad night (496) Order T-Shirt

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