i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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