remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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