I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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