Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where does the pee come out of this thing
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize