Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize