What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
