I feel like abortions should bother me more
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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