I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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