Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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