I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
She bit a glass in half.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize