oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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