Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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