my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize