Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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