dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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