So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
