That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I cockslap morals
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
