no, he came in my armpit
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize