So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
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