I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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