OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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