There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
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i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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