Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
