I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
