:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
oh god was she eating orange peels again
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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