Texts From Last Night

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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight

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  (414): I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight http://tfl.nu/aoch
  Replies (2) Good night (1188) Bad night (469) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading

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  (416): So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading http://tfl.nu/2fp9
  Replies (21) Good night (3127) Bad night (841) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  obviously you're part succubus.

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  (609): Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf? (201): obviously you're part succubus. http://tfl.nu/sqeb
  Replies (8) Good night (2296) Bad night (676)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic

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  (480): so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic http://tfl.nu/3cem
  Replies (94) Good night (8667) Bad night (1963)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories

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  (248): no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories http://tfl.nu/4m9s
  Replies (23) Good night (940) Bad night (4172) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.

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  (209): His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants. http://tfl.nu/6g5r
  Replies (15) Good night (1031) Bad night (6379) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.

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  (715): Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar. http://tfl.nu/6xi2
  Replies (1) Good night (3427) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power

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  (425): the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power http://tfl.nu/ghbk
  Replies (7) Good night (2748) Bad night (703) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.

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  (585): Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you. http://tfl.nu/iycg
  Replies (12) Good night (2358) Bad night (1765) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.

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  (402): I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong. http://tfl.nu/dijt
  Replies (19) Good night (2619) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.

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  (606): I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well. http://tfl.nu/cs63
  Replies (5) Good night (767) Bad night (1367) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.

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  (630): I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts. http://tfl.nu/1rjt
  Replies (2) Good night (1777) Bad night (478) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.

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  (951): We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question. http://tfl.nu/23so
  Replies (13) Good night (1785) Bad night (513) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.

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  (518): I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down. http://tfl.nu/m8at
  Replies (18) Good night (2551) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is

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  (724): Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is http://tfl.nu/t84q
  Replies (4) Good night (813) Bad night (361) Order T-Shirt

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