I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
