Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams