what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
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I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
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Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I am naked and annoyed.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"