Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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