All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize