More tranny stories later!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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