I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize