They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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