Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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