I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?