Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize