You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.