Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind

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  (847): i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind<span style="display: block; padding-left: 6em;"><span></span></span><span style="display: block; padding-left: 6em;"><span></span></span> http://tfl.nu/hyvq
  Replies (11) Good night (613) Bad night (878)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.

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  (704): Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that. http://tfl.nu/31qd
  Replies (10) Good night (450) Bad night (4575)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding

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  (443): You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding http://tfl.nu/vxqr
  Replies (51) Good night (650) Bad night (7162) Order T-Shirt
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.

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  (971): I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger. http://tfl.nu/97wz
  Replies (27) Good night (4048) Bad night (3611) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.

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  (802): She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave. http://tfl.nu/huhd
  Replies (7) Good night (3331) Bad night (769) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.

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  (443): THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED. http://tfl.nu/dr1s
  Replies (13) Good night (2099) Bad night (1314) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter

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  (813): she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter http://tfl.nu/6hrd
  Replies (5) Good night (2458) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter

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  (949): Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter http://tfl.nu/gh1h
  Replies (7) Good night (748) Bad night (1469) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg

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  (860): nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg http://tfl.nu/ezvc
  Replies (5) Good night (3184) Bad night (585) Order T-Shirt
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  (559): View more from California

  Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.

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  (559):Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination. http://tfl.nu/eipz
  Replies (5) Good night (1610) Bad night (549) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab

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  (719): I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab http://tfl.nu/ysz3
  Replies (8) Good night (723) Bad night (1368) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you

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  (641): Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you http://tfl.nu/x1rz
  Replies (5) Good night (1276) Bad night (630)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night

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  (440): no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night http://tfl.nu/ig4q
  Replies (1) Good night (463) Bad night (629) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight

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  (775): He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight http://tfl.nu/2xsm
  Replies (6) Good night (1175) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.

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  (206): Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night. (1-206): That is the scariest sentence I have ever read. http://tfl.nu/zqtn
  Replies (6) Good night (1488) Bad night (253) Order T-Shirt

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