Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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