Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize