people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.