I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.