Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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