he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
