I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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