is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize